Wander Way (A15)

I, Lalla, tried beyond trying in my search,/ Discovering only my efforts had redoubled./ No matter what I did the door remained bolted./ By resolving only to stay there did I see/ The door was my own doing. ~Lal Ded

Truth isn’t intellectual nor intuitive but being only. There’s no doing truth. Understanding is the waiting. Doing is the door. Being is the way.

The practice of attention-minus-thought is not a practice, but my default. Reminding myself of this is the practice.

By the way, there’s nothing wrong with attention including thought, when aware thought is just a tool and not some identity which eclipses the waking day.

It’s also good to remember the lover does the doer. Anandamaya is the link between the so-called individual and universal consciousness.

When dreaming, the mind is like a perpetual motion machine. The secret is to let it spin when not in use, without being hypnotized by its random thoughts.

Deconstruction is the loving doing. Understanding tattvamasi is the waiting. Being is the way. Zhuangzi calls this way wandering at ease.

Consciousness Sonnet A14

Street legal for the first time in two years

and every one of my years is worth five

of yours or vice versa, how does that exactly go?

The great blue heron will be seventeen!

And it’s been fifty years since my last confession.

How long since Sergeant Pepper taught iambic?

My mother at age ninety-three agrees

consciousness is the youth of ten thousand summers.

Yes, it's another paraverse on consciousness—

I fell into the looking glass 09;

there’s nothing else for me to write about now.

This so-called individual consciousness is

the same absolute self-shining consciousness as

that universal consciousness, prior the maya.

Song for Miles

Whether you think consciousness is a material product or not, just rest there. Consciousness knows.

If everything appears in consciousness and nothing appears in deep sleep, how does something appear from out of nothing?

Consciousness is the ground of the universe. Even the mere thought of consciousness is enough to blow your mind.

3/5 of a mile in ten seconds may be 216 mph but it's all about the song in which the mathematics is appearing.

Some Nondual Maps (A13)

Some call individual consciousness, jiva. Some call universal consciousness, isvara. Some call self-shining consciousness, awareness, brahman, parabrahman, brahman nirguna, the absolute, the noumenal, not maya but not nothing, that pure land beyond all names, i.

Some say there are five primary sheaths conditioning universal consciousness. I call them the five superimpositions: outer, inner, thinker, doer, and lover. Some call them, annamaya, pranamaya, manomaya, vijnamaya, anandamaya. Universal consciousness is only conditioned by maya.

In this self-reflexiveness myth, self-shining consciousness descends to material unawareness and back in seven stages. Young calls them, potential, substance, form, combination, organization, mobility, dominion. The turning in the middle of the fourth state is the first step of self-awareness.

Some say there are three states of personal consciousness. The waking state is consciousness dreaming. The dream state is the mind dreaming. Deep sleep is no dreaming or the absence of duality. True awakening, on the other hand, is the presence of nonduality.

Circling back to the five superimpositions, the lover is like a no-man's land, first superimposition. Anandamaya precedes the jiva! Love is the real in the world of the unreal. Anandamaya does not transmigrate! It's the border station for isvara and the jiva. Some call this bhakti.

Koan Number Nine (A12)

That you’ve heard of enlightenment is worth one point. That you believed the concept of enlightenment is worth two points. That you understand the paradox of enlightenment is worth ten thousand points.

No points wins the game.

Enlightenment is self-awareness. Self-awareness is unborn.

Absolute awareness is obviously self-aware.

Another name for unawareness is maya.

Maya is my unborn conditioning.

BEFORE ENLIGHTENMENT IS MAYA AND AFTER ENLIGHTENMENT IS MAYA. MAYA HAS BEEN BURNED INTO MY SCREEN.

Therefore seeing through maya is enlightenment enough.

What is seeing through a koan?

Only that is seeing through a koan.

Following Consciousness (A11)

In reality, don’t follow the money. Follow the consciousness. 

Consciousness isn’t nothing. Consciousness is all there is.

Consciousness is the tvam in tat tvam asi. Consciousness is that, 

that being the gender-neutral vedic name for the absolute godhead.

Although personal consciousness is a concept, 

the substratum of the concept is consciousness.

This consciousness is the same as the self-shining consciousness of that. 

This fact is the essence of nonduality.

One only has to honestly think I am before consciousness takes over.

Even fundamental materialists can use this method 

although in doing so they should expect to be astounded.

Like meditation or any other function of the mind, 

I am is just a method to be used, and not an idol end to fetishize.

Self-shining consciousness and pure awareness are not two.

The Myths of Maya (A10)

Personal consciousness is like the space within an open casket identifying with said casket.

Self-reflexive consciousness is like the absolute reflecting in, pervading throughout, and completely deconstructing maya in the name of self-awareness.

Not body-mind, not jiva (personal consciousness), not isvara (universal consciousness) even, but brahman (self-shining consciousness, pure awareness).

The jiva is universal consciousness reflected in the body-mind. Isvara is self-shining consciousness reflected in maya. Brahman is pure awareness.

There are three states, five superimpositions, and seven stages in self-reflexive consciousness: waking dream, dreaming sleep, deep sleep; outer, inner, thinker, doer, lover; potential, substance, form, combination, organization, mobility, dominion.

The Deconstruction Blues (A9)

First, deconstruct nothing. The concept of nothing is the world’s greatest concept.

From out of the absolute whole is born this hole of nothing.

People so hate the something they think they are,

they’d rather think they’re nothing instead.

So before attempting self-inquiry, this nothing must be deconstructed.

Otherwise, what exactly is there for inquiry?

This is why you need to pay your dues

before singing the deconstruction blues.

This is why you’re sent to do the guru’s kitchen work.

This is why compassion is the requirement in an elementary education.

And between you and me, it’s apparent this is why I am a parent.

God knows what too sweet little nothings

I’d be whispering in your ears if not.

Instead, I’m neither outer, inner, thinker, doer, nor enjoyer.

footnotes

if ego is nothing, and you're not the ego, then you're not nothing, no?

the something you think you are is nothing. the whole you know you are is everything.

and deconstructing nothing saves a lot of spiritual time. if you can't, then game over. next?

in the land of the trickster, knowing one is free is better than thinking one is free, but thinking one is free of the trickster is better than believing one isn't free.

in samsara, everyone is doing time.

in the land of the stupid, stupid is not a glitch. it's a feature, says marjorie.

the waking state is a dream state. dream states are my sleep state. sleep is the dash in self-awareness.

your fear of success is not a fear. it's an affirmation of reality.

because there is a world, everyone lives in ten thousand worlds.

you're either acting in someone else's story or directing yours.

my story is self-awareness. who are you?

a friendly reminder: attention minus cognition equals atman equals brahman.

actually, it's attention minus cognition minus intuition minus affection. new math isn't easy, sister.

i am self-aware, i am self-aware, i am self-aware.

Just Consciousness Talking (A8)

The absolute reflected in illusion is universal consciousness.

Universal consciousness reflected in the body-mind is

personal consciousness, or intelligence.

Intelligence untouched by the mind is intuition.

Intelligence filtered by the mind is belief.

Personal consciousness identifies with the body-mind and voila—

the world of belief, samsara of materialism.

So universal consciousness in the form of realized intelligence is

talking to the so-called personal consciousness of unrealized intelligence

but it’s just consciousness talking to consciousness.

Universal consciousness is always talking to personal consciousness,

but personal consciousness, lost in the mad loud world,

is hard of hearing intuition. Thus, realization depends

upon the silent grace of the real. In the material world,

such grace may look like a nervous breakdown, but it is what it is.

footnotes

myth is the only real rebellion in maya's empire.

the self is self-aware. that self-awareness is universal consciousness. this universal consciousness is the self-reflexive universe. the self-reflexive universe is a myth leading back to the self.

to think i am is to know i am and to know i am is the self-awareness of the self.

intuition and belief are the poles of the mind.

in the realm of self-awareness, it's the job of so-called personal consciousness or nodal consciousness to use the tool of mind. in the art of consciousness and the mind, it becomes one with the mind. this appears to be samsara to the mind.

the mothership of consciousness is always talking to its nodal ship, knowing its the job of its node to travel to the dark side of the moon and back again. just imagine the intricacy.

in a world of constant noise, silence is wealth. similarly, since giving is receiving, pass it on.

Realization Works (A7)

Almost no one thinks they’re doing something bad. See, it’s not the doing that’s the problem but the thinking.

If good works prepare the ground for realization, and only realization knows what good work is, that’s Catch-22 laughs Maya.

Then some are saying unconditional love is the only doer of creative action but that’s easier said than done. But by all means, love.

Even shifting ones identity to a god and surrendering to that god’s intent depends upon a person’s concept of a god. And this is why religious wars.

In the absolute end, realization depends upon the grace of the real. Don’t worry, you know it when you are it.

footnotes

there's nothing wrong with division. 

it's taking a side which causes all the problems.

likewise, there's nothing wrong with the mind.

it's the right place for realization.

in duality, only truth appears to be a paradox.

love is not a thought. love can't be someone's plan, philosophy, or spiritual practice. there are absolutely no objectives when it comes to love. love loves, period.

tonight's ouroboric trinity is vishnu's existential tail, isvara's universal skin of consciousness, and shiva's evolutionary mouth of self-awareness. let us pray.

just because realization is sudden doesn't mean it's not happening now. it really is and you know it.

A RIVER OF REALIZATION RUNS THROUGH SPACETIME

to be real, a river of space-time runs through realization.

although you're always on the river, it's the falling in the river you remember.

in my lifetime, only when i'm in the river do i know i am the river.